You know these people. The ones who write gratitude diaries. Publicly. So everyone else can see how deserving and just generally better they are than everyone else. I’m pretty sure there might be a demographic that applies to this kind of gratitude. Most often, these grateful people are well off, well educated and well in both the physical and mental senses. I guess they do have a lot to be grateful for. But something does bug me when I see a photo posted of some unattainable yoga pose in front of a sunset scrawled with glittering words about being grateful for their GHD hair straightener lasting five years (that is not a made up example, I promise you).

My problem is, what exactly are they grateful for? Beyond the hair straightener, people seem grateful for things like being able to afford a luxury holiday, being able to send their kids to private schools, being able to afford three investment properties which they will eventually give to their children to give them a ‘leg up’ in the world (because, growing up in privilege apparently doesnt already do that). None of them seem to be grateful for being able to learn in a way that made education easy for them, increasing their likelihood of later success. You dont see posts of gratitude for hard work being rewarded (because contrary to popular belief this isnt a guaranteed outcome of putting in the hard yards) or for a good outcome being the result of significant effort and consideration. Why is success considered a natural and expected result of effort? Chance an Chaos are getting a raw deal in the recognition department here I think.

Then you get the absurdists who like to express their gratitude by thanking the Lord for their freedom/righteousness/bigotry/ignorance. The ones who post on social media about being grateful they dont live in a war-torn country, but seem to believe this is the result of some kind of superiority of their existence rather than Chance and Chaos rolling the most complex multi-sided DnD dice to select geography, political climate and gender for a start. Not to mention how much damage our privileged countries wreak in the developing world, taking advantage of political and social instability to maintain the status quo while capitalising on the opportunity to feed consumer greed without being compelled to comply with pesky human rights and environmental protections.

The opposite side of the coin, the ones who post FML about GHD’s dying (again, not made up and different people – I may be missing out on some kind of revolutionary life experience by not owning one), rain on the day of an outdoor activity and dropping their plate of food are just as inane. Nothing like a bit of narcissism to put disadvantaged people in their place. A homeless person asking for money or for food/shelter? Well I cant give them a cent because my work Christmas bonus this year was a fricken food hamper! FML! The fact I had anticipated receiving a certain cash amount and already spent it based on that expectation is not my fault! What, did you expect me to wait until I actually had the funds to make my purchase? Dont be ridiculous! There are kids working sweatshops in war-torn countries that will die of starvation if I dont feed the machine of consumerism! Plus, my GHD just died, so I am having a really bad week and this homeless guy just hassled me….FML!!!

You may feel like I am picking on people who express gratitude for their lot and people who complain about their lot and no one can win. Maybe. Most people are pretty reasonable, I know. They live their lives knowing that at any given moment their circumstances could change drastically and without any perceivable cause. They dont tend to feel the need to publicly express gratitude or dismay for things that are often beyond their control. They may quietly curse poor Chance and Chaos for doing their thing, but accept that its Chance and Chaos’ jobs to keep us on our toes.

Today I am grateful for nothing. But I choose to accept everything. I choose to accept that life is so unpredictable that no matter how rubbish things might be, there is every possibility that could change in a split second. I accept that the big bang’s fallout included the accidental evolution of biological species to create curiosities like humans, dogs, cats and most of the other quadripeds (with the exception of koalas who are the most grumpy animals in existence – take them back, Universe). I accept my existence because when I do, I can then accept the good, the bad and the ugly (again, except for koalas, and sloths, they really freak me out). I have a starting point to work with, to experience all that our short, relatively pointless, but entirely magical lives have to give. I guess, in the end, I am grateful for Chance and Chaos, no matter how much of a hypocrite that makes me.